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Defining Self Love: From Members' Perspectives

In honor of Team WAG’s February Goal and today being the “day of love,” we decided to dive a little deeper into the meaning of self-love.

At the very basic level, self-love is defined as: regard for one's own well-being and happiness (chiefly considered as a desirable rather than narcissistic characteristic).

But how do you care for your own well-being? And what is it that makes you happy?

The truth is, every human has a different love language, AKA feels “loved” differently.

So, we asked #TeamWAG members to share with us what self-love means to them personally. Here are some of the (amazing) answers we received:


“I would say that to me, self-love is treating yourself with the kindness you treat others and using every day as a way to remind yourself that you are a beautifully and wonderfully made individual!” - Natalie ElSawy



“Finally believing you can do it...whatever it is!” - John L Byrd



“Not being afraid to conquer your fears and then celebrate!” - Debbie Trimble Bennington


“Self-love: accepting and loving yourself in all forms. Good days, bad days, good choices, not so good choices, tight abs, thick thighs. Listening to the kind voice inside saying it's ok and doing better next time. Understanding who you are, where you have been and grateful for all of yourself.” - Samantha Lee Hess Aochi



“To me, self-love is learning to treat, nurture and care for the inner-child in oneself... that inner-child who will always be there, no matter how old we are. This includes speaking words of empowerment and love to oneself, and also speaking words of tough-love and accountability.” - Kristin Davi


“To me, self-love is to let go of the things in my past I couldn't control, and love the person those trials made me become. An abusive relationship left me with PTSD, depression, and anxiety. At first, I would get so mad at myself for succumbing and becoming "sick". Over the years, I've learned to accept myself in all of my imperfect glory, to accept and manage the difficulties I have, and to never give up on one day, hopefully, being whole again. Throughout these years, I have helped so many people in awful circumstances in so many ways because of my experiences, and I would like to think I've made a difference in their lives.” - Hanna Kay Wangsgaard



“For me, it's realizing that I in fact can choose courage over comfort, that shame is going to continue to try and be my mental roommate for the rest of my life, however I have absolute power and authority to continuously serve eviction notices. By doing so I will embody all things positive in the present, and continuously remind myself that I am enough!” - Jeremy Knight


“Accepting who I am and being proud of what my body is capable of?” - Katie Carlsen


"Self Love is treating myself like I would a loved one. That means speaking kindly and lovingly to myself. It's being affirming instead of critical, kind and generous with my time instead of stingy. It's doing the things I need to do to be my best version of me, such as working out, eating right, taking care of my health, meditating, setting goals, having good self care practices. It's being grateful for the mistakes I have made in my life that make me who I am.”- Marty Young


“Self love to me: is making yourself a priority and recognizing that you deserve to nourish your mind & body, and truly care for yourself as you care for others. Also, self reliance. Others definitely enrich our lives and fulfill parts of us but there's goals and wants and needs that can't be given, they have to be earned by you.” - Tanya Amason



“Self love is being vulnerable.
It's letting yourself feel without fear.
It's stepping into something that scares you so deeply but knowing it's bigger than you, so you do it anyways.
It's listening to that voice from within that whispers at first but then grows louder as you let yourself hear it.
It's sitting in stillness and listening to your breath.
It's really HEARING someone because you see them as you.
It's showing up... everyday... when it's amazing, terrible or absolutely painful because you know you are deserving of it all.” - Megan Kathleen Smith



“Self-love requires you to be honest about your current choices and thought patterns and undertake new practices that reflect self-worth. Self-love is not a destination; it’s a practice. It is the foundation on which we build a happy life <3” - Rachael Easterbrook


“To me self-love is to follow your heart, dare to dream and to be honest with yourself in every way of your being. It is about embracing your weaknesses and strengths and to assign yourself enough value to always strive to be the best version of you.” - Jeannine Gmelin



“Each day I write down one thing that I love about myself, "I love my smile. I love my ability to see the positive in any situation. I love my strong legs." Self-love is accepting your flaws and choosing to become a better you every day. It is taking time to appreciate what you have instead of worrying about the things you don't. This picture represents so many things to me but I think my smile says it all. You will be eternally happy doing what you love and following your passion. No one can take away the work that you put in. As my lovely coach Melanie told me, ‘you are worth your success.’” - Brittany Shibla



“Self love is many things to me. I believe that self love means something different for everyone, and part of self love is each individual honoring what that definition means to them.

Self love is leading a life of choices that reflect putting self care and your pursuit of happiness as a top priority. I believe this is selfless not selfish. Self love in this capacity allows us to be the best version of ourselves to bring into our relationships, professions and other various endeavors.

Self love is understanding the difference between self kindness and comfort zones. Knowing that its okay if you don't PR your back squat-- but that it is also okay to be hungry for more. Don't spend days beating yourself up over temporary failures or lines that you don't measure up to at the present moment. Failures in the moment do not define us, how we react to them and the kindness we allow ourselves in that moment matter most.

Self love is knowing and understanding both intellectually and emotionally that we are not solely defined by our accomplishments, abs, a number on a barbell or a paycheck. We are individuals that have innumerable measures to our worth including how we treat others, react to adversity, pursuit of authenticity and happiness as well as so much more.

Self love is accepting that you are worthy of love, empathy and compassion. Showing ourselves the same sensitivity, kindness and compassion as we would to those we care about most.

Self love is knowing you are worth the pursuit and attainment of whatever your own personal happiness means to you.” - Danielle Kepics


"To me, self love means commitment. Commitment to the belief that I am worthy and deserving despite the mistakes I make and my imperfections. It is commitment to continue to fight for a future that is better for myself, because I deserve it. ‘It isn’t a love that is constant. It isn’t shiny. Or neat. Or tame. Rather it is a love that is resilient. And messy. And expansive. And wild.’ -Maddie Berky” - Sarah Eliza


It doesn’t matter how you show yourself love, just as long as you do!

Share what self-love means to you in the comments below or by using #WAGgoals. Happy Valentine’s Day!